Steppin' out....of the way.

I've recently signed back up with the gym. I go for the group fitness classes (which is the least 80's way to say aerobics) and I love them. They are the most like a dance class- loud music and choreography that at times can be challenging. So at least 4 times a week I don my headband and my leg warmers and head out the door to get physical.

Being a veteran aerobics junkie with a huge point to prove, I go to the 4:30 step class knowing that I can do it all. I could get up and teach it myself I didn't suffer from a debilitating fear of public speaking.

Last Saturday , the step class was particularly demanding, but that's OK. I know everything and I can totally do it.

I couldn't.

I was so frustrated with myself over one stupid move that I kept trying even when the rest of the class had continued on. To make matters worse I could execute the “step-kick-around-to-the-front-turn-march-march-over-the-step-and-back-to-home” beautifully on the right but looked like a drunk hippopotamus when I tried the same maneuver on the left. I guess I'm not an ambi-turner.

I gave up.

I participated in the rest of the class and when we got to the drunk hippo move, thinking that I wouldn't...no...couldn't get it, I stopped thinking about it. I'll give you 2 guesses as to what happened next.

I arrived at the same place everyone else, having pulled off THE hardest step aerobics move in the history of step aerobics (I am aware that it probably wasn't the most difficult move as everyone else had no trouble, but for the purpose of this blog and my pride- it was absolutely top 5).

So, what is the point to this? Your body knows. When you over think, analyze and scrutinize what you are supposed to do, you get in your own way. My muscles – although tired – knew exactly where I needed to go and how to get me there.

Your body knows. This goes for anything. Sick, tired, working out or hungry...when you are wondering what's next, get out of the way and listen. I don't doubt you'll be shown the way.

What are you trying to tell me?

I watch T.V. Not a lot, but I do have those shows that I enjoy. Mark and I recently acquired a PVR. (personal video recorder) which we have lovingly named “the purve”. It's the running joke in our house. We love our purve. We are able to fast forward all the commercials that, I swear, are specifically designed to tell me that I am a complete moron who cannot open a can of tuna without a trip to the E.R.

Seriously, have you sat and actually watched these commercials? There's the “slap-chop” commercial (and who doesn't know the slap-chop guy?). The one that suggests that your soap dispenser is so dirty that no one in your house should touch it- don't even look at it. And Mark's personal favorite: the wallet that holds 43 credit cards, your keys, about 73 cents in change and your neighbours' dog. According to the television, if I don't have all these necessary gadgets, I shouldn't be left alone without adult supervision. For the ladies out there....have you really ever had as much trouble shaving your legs as the girl who practically gives herself a concussion because she slipped in the tub trying to use the shaving cream? (although on a side note-if you buy razors because they're pretty, also buy band-aids)

The one I saw that inspired this little rant of mine is relatively new. It's trying to sell you on the fact that your bathroom hand towel so filthy you should now use disposable paper towel. Are you serious? How is this better for our already struggling environment? Towels can be washed (and hopefully are) on a regular basis. People- Wash your towels!!


Dear Marketing Departments,

We the people are smart, intelligent and educated. As such, we request that you discontinue your method of making us believe that we are inadequate without a device that will chop half a tomato to oblivion. We are through feeling like we don't know how to stack our Tupperware. No longer are we going to entertain the idea that drinking beer will somehow get us 40 new friends who love to dance and a summer cabin on the lake. Inform us of your deals and one-time offers. But, please know this, at NO TIME will I be sending you my gold-especially through the mail!!


Dear Purve,

Thanks.